There are many reasons why a girl breaks up with a boy. And in most cases her intentions are pretty clear: she just wants to “get out” because this whole ordeal isn’t up to her expectations. However, no matter how sharp and dry a woman’s motives may seem, there is one specific reason that should be pointed out before giving up: is she putting you through “the test”? And if it is… how can you make sure you pass?
Well, first we need to define what exactly is this “proof” I am referring to. In the simplest of descriptions, it’s a woman’s way of telling a guy that it’s time for him to step things up or it’s time for him to get lost…an indirect “all or nothing” proposition, so to speak. What does this mean? To be frank: she wants a solid commitment (engagement/marriage).
So how can you be sure that the reasons for their breakup are simply part of a test? It is really not that difficult. All you need to do is take 3 things into consideration:
1. The duration of the relationship
2. Your age
3. The marital status of your closest friends and immediate family members (for example, sisters)
For example, if you’ve been together for several years (2-5 or more) and you’re in your 20s or 30s, then it’s quite possible that the reason she broke up with you was simply to “surprise” her. you in the commitment.
Another thing to consider: are you in your early thirties? Because many single women naturally panic at this point in their lives because their biological clocks are ticking. They want to get married and have children.
And finally, if most of her friends are married or engaged but she’s still single…it should be painfully obvious to you that she wants to “jump on the bandwagon.”
So let’s say the circumstances of your relationship fit the above criteria (more or less), and you’ve concluded that the reasons for your breakup were nothing more than a test. How to proceed to recover it?
Simple…give her what she wants, but give it to her tactfully. The first thing you should do is face her. Tell her that you realize why she broke up with you and that you’re ready to settle down, but she sets a hard date. Don’t leave things up in the air or you’ll soon give him yet another reason to break up.
If you accept… great… mission accomplished. However, if she rejects your proposal, don’t give up hope just yet. Understand that it will take some time for her to trust your seriousness to commit and to get over her shattered sense of pride (after all, you have rejected her one way or another). But with a good dose of patience and firm steps in the right direction, you’ll eventually be able to overcome her resistance and turn her breakouts into nothing more than a vague memory from the past.