Separation anxiety, unfortunately, is a subject near and not so dear to my heart. My dog has suffered from severe separation anxiety for over two years, actually since I’ve had him. In fact, his anxiety about being separated from him was one of the inspirations behind thephillydog.com. He was frustrated by the lack of resources he could easily find on the subject. Anyway, I’ve tried every, and I mean every, treatment out there when it comes to separation anxiety. I have talked and worked with dozens of trainers and tried dozens of methods. From Kongs to 45-minute races to puppy playmates, I’ve amassed a wealth of information on the subject.
Separation anxiety is a condition in dogs where the dog, for whatever reason, becomes overly attached to its owner. It is often seen in dogs that have been rescued or have experienced some type of abandonment.
Do you have a dog that has separation anxiety? Do you find yourself scheduling your life around your dog because you can’t leave him alone? Does your dog panic when you leave? Does your dog bark/howl/whine when you leave the house? Cause massive destruction? Do you pant, shake, or drool when you’re getting ready to start the day? Does your puppy depend too much on you? Do you depend too much on your dog? Is he now totally and utterly anxious about his dog’s anxiety?
Dogs with separation anxiety will often follow their owners everywhere, from room to room, and will NEVER let their owners out of their sight. The dog should always be close to its owner and rarely seek attention from anyone else. Author Patricia McConnell, whose book “I’ll be Home Soon” I highly recommend, refers to these types of dogs as “velcro” dogs.
McConnell maintains that these “velcro” dogs are absolutely traumatized when their owner leaves them. While some dogs are destructive when their owner leaves them alone during the day (because they are bored), the true dog with separation anxiety goes through a kind of “panic attack.” Watch a YouTube video for an example. This panic attack occurs within the first 20 minutes after the owner leaves. If you enter “separation anxiety” on the YouTube page, there are several examples of this. The panic attack sometimes begins to rear its ugly head as soon as the dog senses that the owner is getting ready to leave, for example, when the owner showers for work in the morning, when the owner puts on his coat . or pick up the keys. The dog’s tail may go between its legs, it may begin to drool, or the dog may begin to shake or shudder or may try to hide under furniture. My dog, for example, puts his tail between his legs as soon as he gets it into his head that I’m leaving, and he always feels it, even when I vary my routine. Then he starts shaking and tries to crawl under the bed.
Some owners are faced with the difficult decision of crating a dog suffering from separation anxiety. Some of these dogs do a great deal of destruction around the house to deal with their panic. Unfortunately, many of these dogs do not do well in cages; sometimes these dogs feel even more claustrophobic and penning the dog up can make things worse. My dog, for example, seems very claustrophobic and no matter how wonderfully I have tried to make the crate, it makes it worse. I fear that one day he will break a tooth. Since he’s not destructive, I plan on not pigeonholing him.
However, leaving the dog without a crate may simply not be an option because the dog could certainly get hurt if left without a crate because of the type of damage it causes in the home.
However, the dog may still bark/howl, which is a big problem if you live in an apartment.
So how do you know if your dog has separation anxiety? The main difference between a dog who is just bored/lonely and the dog with separation anxiety is that the usual “tricks” will not work for the dog with separation anxiety. For example, a lot of exercise (while important and helpful) will not stop panic attacks. While you should always exercise your dog, it won’t make the anxiety go away (although I’m guessing if you stopped exercising your dog it would make things worse!). Giving the dog with separation anxiety a peanut butter filled Kong will usually not work. The dog is too focused on the owner and too stressed to eat.
On the other hand, a bored or lonely dog will be very interested in the Kong or whatever toy you give him. Giving these dogs something to do while you are away helps these types of dogs. That is why these dogs do not suffer from separation anxiety.
These toys are very useful, however, in desensitizing a separation anxious dog to your departure. By pairing the separation anxiety dog’s favorite treats (in a kong) with you picking up his keys and then putting them down, you can get your dog acclimated to keys being associated as something “not so bad.” This process, however, can take a long, long, long time. Months. In the meantime, the dog cannot be left alone, otherwise the progress will be lost.
Is there hope for the dog with separation anxiety? Maybe. Some never get better, some “stay”. These dogs often end up in shelters, which only reinforces their separation anxiety problem if they end up being adopted. There are medications available, such as Clomicalm, an antidepressant, that vets use in these situations. While Clomicalm takes the “edge” off, the dog STILL needs to be trained and learn to be more confident and distance himself from his owner and learn to be alone. These medicines, by themselves, will not solve the problem.
Many owners wonder if having another dog will solve the problem. The general answer is no.” Separation anxiety is not about being alone. It is about being away from the HOLDER. Therefore, another dog will not change that. A good example would be comparing the situation with a new mother who has sent her baby to daycare Consider the type of anxiety and how worried she is while her baby is away from her The dog would be the mother and the owner would be the infant No number of mothers (or dogs) would offer comfort or change that situation There would still be anxiety.
However, some owners have had great success getting another dog. I would advise against running out and getting another dog just to solve this problem. Adding another dog is a big responsibility, and you could end up with two dogs with separation anxiety. Instead, see if you could adopt a dog or if a friend could “loan” you their dog for a while to see if that changes the situation. If yes, then that may be one of the solutions for you.
What can you do? Most importantly, as the owner of a dog with separation anxiety, there are steps you can take to help your dog become more independent. You should put your dog on a “you” diet – only give your dog attention when you choose to, not every time your dog wants or demands attention. You can’t have your dog sleeping in your bed. Your dog MUST learn to stay AWAY from you. Get your dog his own bed and place it on the floor next to his bed. Let him learn that he can get through the night without being by his side. DO NOT let him follow you from room to room. Do not let your dog in the bathroom when you take a shower, etc. Do not let your dog in your room when you change.
These may seem like minor things, but they add up. Enter an obedience class or agility class to give your pup even more confidence. Eventually, this should teach your dog that it’s okay to be alone and that you’re not going anywhere and if you do, you’ll come back.
