Are you looking for tips to save a marriage because you’re feeling dead inside? A lot of people get to that point when they can’t remember the last time they felt happy in their marriage.
I was in the same boat actually. I got to a point when I was having such a troubled marriage that my self-esteem was down the tubes, and basically I began feeling numb and stuck.
When my wife and I first got married we were full of life and so excited to just be together and then I guess reality sets in, and suddenly the excitement wears off somehow.
You’re just left with the empty feeling of monotony. And when there’s fighting and constant disagreeing on top of all of that it’s even more painful, leaving you feel more dead inside.
This happens a lot, and after we solved a great deal of our problems my wife admitted to having been feeling the same way too for years. And I thought I was so exciting, how could that have happened. LOL
I can laugh now, but I know that what you’re going through is no laughing matter. It hurts and it can lead to a spiritual spiral that sinks right into a deep depression if we’re not careful and don’t nip it in the butt! So off we go to look for tips to save a marriage that will get us out of all of this doom and gloom.
The thing that I found out quickly was this.
As being 50% of the marriage, sometimes we forget about our own half of what’s going on, and instead of working on ourselves, we try so hard to work on the marriage as a whole, or worse, on our spouse.
In other words, if you were to do the things that would change your end of the deal then the marriage would at least in your eyes, and from your perspective, be fifty percent better. That’s because that’s the part that you CAN control.
The other key to fixing a troubled marriage, where you feel dead inside is by making sure that you’re seeing a marriage through a paradigm that will serve you instead of drain you.
We often see a marriage from our own perception which isn’t how things really are, and usually are certainly not through the same perception of our spouse. That’s when confusion sets in, and assumption starts flying, and it drags the marriage down with it like a sinking ship.
In other words, you ALONE can change your marriage by seeing the marriage in new ways (perception), and therefore changing yourself (or your 50%) of the marriage. This won’t lead to a perfect marriage because at this time you can’t control your spouses actions.
But ask yourself this… if you could improve your marriage by at least 50% this year would that be something that you’d be willing to work at. Most people would jump at that.
And of course I say by at least because in most cases…in my marriage as well…something happens where the other spouse begins to follow your lead and begin improving too when they see you improving yourself.
I hope that you’ll take these tips to save a marriage to heart because they represent exactly what changed my own marriage.
