How do you make decisions? When you’ve narrowed it down to just two or three options, what mechanisms do you use to get to The Ultimate Choice?
When you think about it, you can see that you are making decisions all day. What to wear, what’s for breakfast, how to solve this problem, where to put that object. We are always making decisions and we always have a choice, even if it doesn’t always seem like it.
Most decisions are so easy that they go unnoticed, automatically. You grab your raincoat after hearing a wet forecast, without agonizing. Other decisions require more conscious thought: Will your shoes be pink or purple today?
This post is about those moments when the task of making a decision has you deeply confused, when the choice is extraordinary, difficult, not the everyday kind.
People often freeze in such situations, but here’s a super simple way to order your thoughts so you can continue.
1. Find a clean notebook and pen. Sit in a quiet place. Open the notebook and write a statement that summarizes the decision you must make.
Will I move to New City or stay in Home Town?
2. Write freely for several minutes, letting everything that comes out of your pen make its mark without guidance. Do not stop writing, filling in nonsense if necessary. Try this without even lifting your pen off the page every time.
New City has been on my mind for the past six months since that opportunity came up and Kristin told me about…
3. Take a deep breath. Imagine that you select an option that is available to you. Write a description of the result of making that choice. Now do the same for each of the available options. Spend a few minutes on each option. Use a timer if you wish, to ensure that you give equal time to each possible option.
In New City I will have to find a new job and a new home and all the new things that are scary but also exciting…
In Home Town I can keep in touch with my friends and I can have my cat, but this house is very run down…
That’s enough. You can keep your notebook for now. But make sure you come back the next day. Read your previous entry. Repeat the sequence again, if you are so moved.
If it seems like you’re close to making a decision but want a little more “proof,” try the following sequence.
1. Write a list of words associated with the decision. Freely write on each word for a couple of minutes.
Work, home, cat…
2. List the pros and cons of making each choice. Do this in parallel columns, so you can easily compare.
3. Turn to a new page in your notebook. Look around your surroundings, wherever you are. Taking a random cue from your surroundings, write for five to ten minutes. Forget your decision making for the moment.
night is coming. The horizon shines with the faintest pink. It’s so delicate! And the fireflies are rising. They’re lurking, which makes me laugh a little…
Again, put the notebook away overnight and then read again the next day.
Decisions often feel like life or death to us, which causes us great stress. These journaling exercises are tools to delve into the resources we possess that have been hidden under the many mists of perception. Accessing your deep intelligence in this way relieves stress and builds confidence powerfully.
Simply by journaling, letting the pen mediate our thinking, we can come into close contact with the inner knowing, the inner self that can naturally identify the choice that will serve us best.
Having trouble making a big decision? Mari L. McCarthy, Journaling Specialist, can guide you through the process. Information is at http://www.createwritenow.com/journaling-services/.
