“Suicide sometimes comes from cowardice, but not always, because cowardice sometimes prevents it; since so many live because they are afraid of dying, as they die because they are afraid of living.”
Charles Caleb Colton
Few people are aware that suicide remains one of the leading causes of death among people around the world. It really is a global problem. However, it is a sad fact when you consider the number of preventative measures available to handle these tragic situations. Unfortunately, it is also the essence of suicide that makes it difficult for you to protect your loved ones.
MAIN WARNING SIGNS
In rare cases, there may be no signs or symptoms before a person commits suicide. However, making a consistent effort to spend time with the people you care about can make you more aware of warning signs that others would have easily missed.
A person is at high risk of committing suicide if they have any of the following signs or symptoms:
• Talking, thinking or writing about suicidal thoughts, even occasionally.
• Make a conscious effort to acquire a means of suicide, for example, stockpiling pills or buying a gun.
• Show behaviors that indicate social withdrawal, such as spending too much time alone or avoiding contact with other people.
• Have extreme or even occasional mood swings for unexplained reasons.
• Spending too much time thinking or talking about issues related to violence or death.
• Admit that you feel hopeless or trapped by a particular situation in your personal life, at school, or at work.
• Increased use of drugs, alcohol, nicotine, or any other form of substance abuse.
• Sudden and unexplained changes in your regular routine, such as your sleeping patterns and eating habits.
• Taking sudden and too many unnecessary risks with their lives, such as reckless driving, gambling, drug use, or unprotected sex.
• Write your last will, make arrangements for how your possessions should be disposed of in case they are gone, or give away your belongings apparently for no good reason.
• Say goodbye as if you are leaving or leaving forever.
• Present major personality changes, as well as showing a serious inability to cope with stress and anxiety or with life in general.
It is always best to play it safe when dealing with people who may be at risk of suicide. If you have any reason to hope that a loved one is thinking of attuning himself, then he should contact the proper authorities about it. Be sure to share your concerns with others so that they too can care for your loved one.
If you are personally in danger of committing suicide, there are proactive steps you can take to prevent it. The coping strategies below cover it in more detail, but here are some of the main points to consider.
• Talk to a loved one or close friend about what you are going through. Take the courage to be completely honest about your situation.
• Contact suicide prevention hotlines. Crisis help lines are free and available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
• Talk to a spiritual advisor if you think this might help your situation.
• Seek professional help.
POSSIBLE CAUSES OF SUICIDE
It is difficult to pinpoint the exact cause of suicide. One surprising fact, however, is the possibility that genetics may play a role in suicide. Some studies show that there may be a relevant genetic component to suicide. If there is a history of suicide in your family, then it can also put you at higher risk of committing suicide. This is not intended to alarm anyone who may find themselves in this particular situation. Rather, it is meant to empower people to be aware of potential risks. Being aware of possible risks can be very empowering. In other words, once you know there could be a potential risk, you can better equip yourself with the necessary coping skills and strategies listed below.
Here is a list of situations that commonly act as triggers for suicidal thoughts or actual suicide attempts.
• Do you feel lonely, socially isolated, or without hope in your life?
• Has something particularly stressful recently happened in your life and is it something you feel you can’t cope with? Examples of this include, but are not limited to, losing a loved one, participating in your first battle as a military officer, breaking up with your partner, being diagnosed with a serious medical condition, finding out you are bankrupt, or becoming an object of a lawsuit
• Substance abuse is not always a symptom of suicide. Sometimes it can be one of its triggers because its side effects can make you more open to having suicidal thoughts.
• Do you have access to any means to attempt suicide?
• Is it possible that he suffers from some type of psychiatric disorder? This includes but is not limited to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), depression, paranoia, phobia, or psychosis.
• Is there a history of mental disorder of any kind in your family? What about a history of suicide, physical abuse, or substance abuse?
• Do you suffer from any type of illness in which depression is one of its possible symptoms?
• Are you suffering any type of discrimination?
• Is there something important in your life that does not receive critical support from loved ones? An example of this is if your family does not approve of your lifestyle, job, or your decision to come out as gay.
Special factors should be considered if you are concerned about children or adolescents committing suicide.
• Is your child likely to have any type of mental or psychiatric disorder, diagnosed or undiagnosed?
• Is your child concerned about a troubled relationship with a family member or close friend?
• Is there a history of any type of abuse in your family?
• Is your child exposed to substance abuse of any kind?
• Is your daughter pregnant?
• Is there a chance your child has an STD or sexually transmitted infection of some kind?
• Is your child experiencing bullying or discrimination?
• Does your child seem to have problems with his sexual orientation?
SUICIDE AND MURDER
Sometimes what you need to watch out for is a trend or the possibility of a loved one committing murder. If that is likely, then suicide may also follow. Unfortunately, this kind of tragedy happens all too often. The amount of suffering it causes is immeasurable. But it can be avoided if people are taught how to learn to cope with rejection and failure. If a person has not developed coping skills and life gives them a bad blow, sometimes things can get worse. When people cannot cope and if they are left alone, tragedy usually follows. Everyone needs help at some point in their life. Some of the main problems that could lead to suicide are the following:
• Relationship problems, such as extramarital affairs, sexual abuse, and jealousy and control problems.
• Financial problems, such as bankruptcy, unexpected rent increases, or discovering that you have lost a large amount of money on your investment.
• Legal problems, such as knowing that you may have inadvertently committed a crime or that someone else is suing you.
MEDICINE
It is a sad fact that there are also certain types of prescription drugs that list depression as a possible side effect. If you or a loved one has no choice but to take this type of medication, then you should be very vigilant for any unusual actions, behaviors or thoughts.
Be sure to tell a friend or family member if you are taking medications that may alter your personality. Someone on the outside looking in, so to speak, might recognize the signs that something isn’t right before you do.
COPING STRATEGIES
Below are a number of key strategies you can use to help yourself, a friend or family member. It barely touches on the subject, so I would encourage people to further research the topic through the internet, books, and self-help groups. Remember, knowledge is power!
• Do nothing now. You may be in a lot of pain, but try to distance yourself from your thoughts and actions. Being depressed and thinking about suicide is completely different from actually doing it. It’s depression and stress that make you think in a way you normally wouldn’t. Give you a chance. Tell yourself that you will give it another day or even a week just to have a chance to think instead of act.
• If you are taking drugs and/or alcohol, suicidal thoughts can become even stronger. These substances will alter your natural way of thinking. I have no doubt that many people took their lives under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Drugs and alcohol only add to the problems people face. The world is a whole different place when you’re sober. Reality can be harsh at times, but it’s the only reality we have. And we can live in this reality if we give ourselves a chance. There are ways to face and overcome our problems.
• Identify situations that trigger feelings of despair or trigger suicidal thoughts. It could be the upcoming anniversary of the loss of a loved one, excessive alcohol or drug use, and the stress of breaking up a relationship or struggling with one’s sexual identity. There are, of course, many other reasons, but the most important thing is to be aware of what triggers you. Simply being honest with yourself can take a huge weight off your shoulders and help you avoid these triggers in the future.
• The nature of depression or suicidal feeling means that a person wants to isolate themselves from society and everyone around them. Due to this fact, it can make things seem difficult to recover, but this is not true. Even if you don’t want or feel like talking to people you know, there are crisis helplines that people can use to talk about their feelings. Remember, we are social creatures and it is never a good idea to try to do it alone.
• Try to build a support network for yourself. Have phone numbers handy in case you need them. Always have someone just a phone call away. This could be your GP, a friend, family member or a crisis line. When all else fails, a crisis line could be your lifeline. Remember, you are never really alone because crisis lines are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. People volunteering their services wouldn’t be on the other end of the line unless they cared. People care about other people, so you are not alone.
• Take care of yourself. What you eat and drink and how much fresh air and exercise you get is very important. I can tell you that fresh air and just going for a short walk (which is free by the way) goes a long way. Even basic deep breathing exercises can put you in a different mindset. • It is important to remember that nothing stays the same. I understand that this may seem difficult to accept when you are feeling depressed or suicidal, but it is true. When life hits us hard, it takes time to recover. After all, we are only human. We have to give ourselves a chance. One small step at a time is the key to achieving something big. Assuming too much too soon is never a good idea. When a young child first begins to learn to walk, he falls many times. But no matter how many times the child falls down, he will keep getting up until he learns to stand on his own two feet. Life does the same thing when we get older, but remember, it never stays the same as long as we get up and move on. It doesn’t matter how many times I take!
Copyright Piaras O Cionnaoith 2013.
