So many beautiful girls are dumped every day. And as they sit there, their pride shattered, they think, “I’m everything a man would look for. Why did he leave me?” The truth is that a beautiful face and a sleek body are nowhere near what a guy needs to keep him attracted to her. Sure, it’s what he notices in the first few minutes, and then he moves on to more fun stuff.
Forget the fallacy that attraction must wane over time. I have seen many elderly couples who have been together for decades, but are still head over heels in love with each other. We’ve rounded up unspoken reasons why a man’s attraction fades and also given some tips on how to avoid being dumped.
He has very high expectations.
Every guy has a list of things he wants his perfect girl to be. Sometimes it’s really not your fault if he loses interest. It is a rule that you should never change who you are for anyone. If you’re looking for someone you just can’t measure up to no matter what you do, flaunt your assets or walk away.
Here’s the deal: You’re not his type, and he finds that every time he backs down, you do what he wants. He will light a light bulb in his head and he will play with you like a puppet. But if you show him that nothing can influence you, he will respect you more and more.
He couldn’t deal with unbelievable revelations.
You’re lying in bed, cuddling, and he starts asking you about the men you’ve been with. “How much?” he asks, and you say, “Well, there’s Tony, Marcus, Bryan, Olsen, Neil, Walter and Carl…” and the list goes on as his eyes get bigger and bigger in disbelief. He just can’t get it out of his head that you have been present and he will think differently of you. How to avoid this?
Stay away from these kinds of questions early in the relationship, especially when you haven’t established a stable bond yet. There are other unavoidable things you may discover, which are not your fault at all. He may not be able to accept your religion or your ideals; it’s a compromise, but if you insist on staying away because of that, then it’s not worth it at all.
It is confused with sex and love.
Normally, a guy can draw a straight line between the two of them. But what if they’ve been dating consistently and now he comes over more often for sex? He begins to need you more and mistakes it for love. So when there are times when you can’t give it to him (the red flag is up or you’re too tired), he gets mad because he thinks you don’t love him. He keeps the attraction strong by not giving in to his sexual needs when he wants to. He will discover that you too must have a say in this whole game.
Can’t beat the first impression.
When he met you, you were a quiet girl walking her dog. And the next time you go out, he’ll see you wild and nasty on the dance floor. There goes your pull out the door. Your change in behavior completely puts him off and he will think you were putting on a show the first time. Of course you weren’t, but that’s what he’ll think. To avoid this, you need to break it gently.
First, you can go out and have a few drinks. Then you can take it to the dance floor. When you’re dancing, show him that you’re dancing for him and that you don’t mind others looking at you. He will feed his ego and he won’t care that you are grinding so sexy after all.
It has a detour.
He likes girls, and when he met you, he fell in love instantly. But some kids have their own first love, one they’ve had since they were kids: toys. Your man may be interested in games and toys. Instead of throwing a tantrum when he’s not paying attention to you, you can distract him by cooking something very special or teasing him in a sexy way. You won’t know what hit you.
You feel the relationship is abusive.
Abuse doesn’t mean you’re hitting him with a bat every time he makes a mistake. For men, nags fit the bill perfectly. The abuse may mean that you just don’t think there is justice in the relationship. You always get your way, and when you don’t, you make him suffer. He can’t be wrong, or you’ll give him a hard time. And, on top of that, you don’t really give it time at all.
You are with your friends and he has nothing to say. You use derogatory comments when you talk to him, often channeling them into his pride and his masculinity. You want me to buy you material things, and you won’t take no for an answer, and you won’t show the slightest sign of appreciation. You can date, but drag him into World War 3 if he does the same.
The relationship has hit a wall.
oh boy. This is the hardest. What do you do when you can’t think of things to talk about or do together? Creativity is the reason many couples last for decades. They always find magical ways to spend time together. If your relationship has hit a wall, ask him out. Have dinner and get out of town. Get away from work and just spend the day in a whole new environment. Get her a present. Do something you never do for him. You will be amazed how it goes back to being like day 1.
